And The Hits Keep Coming

Six weeks tomorrow. How is this possible!? How can I have slept alone for six weeks, not felt your arms around me, not smelled the warm smell of your skin, not seen the twinkle of your eyes, not seen the flash of your smile or heard the bright bark of your laugh in six weeks? 

Worse is knowing that I shall never have these things ever again. That I shall never hear the deep rumble of your voice again. That I will never wake up and hear you breathing beside me in the bed again. That you will never try to sneak up behind me again (and fail), no more private jokes, no more laughing till we cry, no more talking for hours and hours. No more falling asleep in your arms or waking up on your chest... because you are gone. You died. 

 Five days. You got a "cold" couldn't breathe and five days later you were dead of Covid-19 Delta Variant! No time to say goodbye, no time to prepare, no time... 

 Now I'm here trying to pick up the pieces of my life, comfort our children and grandchildren and figure out a life without you by my side. I love you my husband, my lover my dearest friend! I miss you James!