Eight & 1/2 Months
That's how long I've now lived without you looking at me this way. Without those amazing eyes gazing into my very heart and knowing my heart before I did. Without that secret smile that said, "I know you better than you know yourself and I love you far more than anyone else ever will and I know you don't understand that and that makes me love you even more."
I find it so hard to believe I have been able to not only go on without you but even thrive. And I know that a huge reason for that is because of all the years you spent loving me and making me whole and able to stand confident again.
I never wanted this but since this is my new reality and the life I now face I find that I am able to do it so much better because of who I am after the years of being loved so well by you.
Thank you for 23 years of smiles, tears, laughter (oh, the laughter!!), joy, heartache, pain, love, hugs, kisses, conversations, dreams... memories.
And thank you for always looking at me the way no one else ever has or ever will, no matter how bad I looked, how sick I was, how angry I got, how wrong I was, how fat, old or grey... you always looked at me with that special look in your eye. And I will always be grateful and love you for it.
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